Happy Holidays.

Yesterday I had an interesting experience in the parking lot of Bed, Bath, and Beyond over near Lakeside. I wasn’t so sure I was going to write up anything on it, but I’ve found myself thinking about it a bit, so… here goes:

Well, it all started with my plan for buying a toaster. See, my parents had purchased the Black & Decker toaster mounting hood which one uses to hang a few specific models of toaster under the cabinet. They were trying unsuccessfully to find the matching toaster, so I told them I’d take a look for one… Living near Lakeside Mall, I figured that I would visit all the housewares-type stores around the area. That led me first to Target, then Home Depot, Best Buy, and eventually Bed, Bath, and Beyond.

Well, en route from Best Buy to Bed, Bath, and Beyond, I had to cross M-59 on a road that is, at least for a portion of it’s route, called Utica Park Place. Well, heading south on Utica Park Place across M-59 is two distinct lanes, which both are allowed (per marked sign) to drive straight through the intersection. (See the aforementioned intersection here. I believe the picture is a bit old, because now the right lane can turn right or continue straight, the left can turn left or continue straight, as would be expected from such an intersection.)

While driving in the right hand lane, in the process of crossing westbound M-59, I noticed a minivan ~6″ from the drivers side of my car, and the male driver and female passenger rather upset, yelling and gesturing towards me. I honked, and waved my hand trying to figure out what was going on, as the driver kept the vehicle consistantly close to mine. The vehicle was close enough, that had I tapped my brakes, I likely would have lost the side mirror of my car. Well, I sped up a little to get away from them, moving through the intersection, as they quickly cut behind me. Rather upset at almost getting side swiped, I then reached my arm up and flipped them off, giving them the standard “what the fuck are you doing?” sign.

So, nothing bizarre thus far… Typical suburban Michigan driving, especially in a shopping district around the holidays.

After parking and starting to walk into Bed, Bath, and Beyond, I hear a vehicle pull up behind me and some male voice start yelling at me. Turns out it’s the same minivan which almost hit me a few minutes earlier. Sitting in his van, window rolled down, and again blocking traffic, the guy is practically screaming at me asking why I flipped him off when I “WAS WRONG”. After listening to his forceful insistance that, despite road signs to the contrary, I was in a right-hand-turn-only lane and that I “squeezed him over” and was “WRONG”, he turned to my hand-based expression of malcontent.

This is where it got really bizarre… He repeatedly insisted that I should not have given such a gesture because his “babies”, and yes, he said babies, were in the back seat, and such gestures are inappropriate in front of children. Ignoring the fact that diminuitive passengers in the rear seats of a minivan can hardly see out the front window of a vehicle, I asked him if his young children were already aware of the symbolism of such hand gestures*, to which he answered in the affirmative. If his head was clear enough to understand it, it probably upset this person a bit when I asked him if he thought it was responsible parenting (I believe I asked if it was “smart” or “wise”) to teach children profane hand gestures at such a young age. Actually, I’m fairly certain it did because that was when he started yelling even louder about how I’m going to “really hurt” and “regret it” if I were to do such a thing again. Over and over he made kept screaming that I was wrong, and that I will be “hurt” if such a thing happens again.

It was right around here where I realized that this guy really isn’t worth continuing to deal with and just turned and walked into the store.

I could sit here and debate what it is that makes someone act as this guy did… Anger over the (percieved) stresses of the holidays? A need to break out of a feeling of immasculation brought about by his driving a wife and small children to Babies’N’Things? General feelings of malice? There are so many reasons that it’s not really worth considering them. Regardless, it made for an interesting day, and yet another event to contemplate.

…and yet another reason to desire to live elsewhere.

* I believe this exchange went as follows: I asked if “your young children can already recognize such hand gestures? don’t you see that as a problem?” and in the middle of asking that he screamed “YES YOU WERE WRONG”.