{"id":6342,"date":"2004-06-01T14:10:00","date_gmt":"2004-06-01T18:10:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nuxx.net\/blog\/2004\/06\/01\/6342\/"},"modified":"2026-07-01T11:32:35","modified_gmt":"2026-07-01T15:32:35","slug":"6342","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nuxx.net\/blog\/2004\/06\/01\/6342\/","title":{"rendered":"…"},"content":{"rendered":"

VisionTek<\/a> sure uses some wacky terms to describe their video cards. Check this out…<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

With 8 pipelines, pushing through 3 BILLION pixels per second, and 4 parallel GEO-Metry engines, processing 380 million [T&L] polygons per second, this card gives GRATUITOUS, adult entertainment. The 9800XT supports 128-bit, 64-bit and 32-bit floating-point color formats. HI-RES 32-bit, 3D gaming up to 2048×1536 for head-shooting, flesh-ripping, ALARMING graphics power.<\/p>\n

The 9800XT fronts more than 18 BILLION (with a “B”) anti-aliasing samples per second for AWESOME performance up to 16 trilinear filtered texture samples per pixel. ATI’s programmable SMARTSHADER\u00aa 2.1 makes head-wounds and severed limbs look real with enhanced lighting and texture effects, while SMOOTHVISION\u00aa 2.1 serves up full-scene anti-aliasing.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/cite>
\n(taken from here<\/a>)<\/p>\n

Computers have gone to the ricers. :(<\/p>\n

[UPDATE: I found a bit more…]<\/p>\n

Here<\/a>‘s the one I was originally thinking of when I went digging around VisionTek<\/a>‘s site:<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Freak’n KICK ASS performance
\nXtasy 9500 Pro, powered by ATI\u2019s RADEON\u2122 9500 PRO VPU with 128MB DDR memory WILL BLOW YOU\u2026 AWAY! ATI’s TRUFORM technology makes heaving orbs more ample and well-endowed, while HYPER Z\u2122 II saves bandwidth for mo’ righteous performance in your more demanding sit-e’ations. ATI’s SMOOTHVISION, anti-aliasing, KICKS THE CRAP out of visual distortion, and sends that BI-A-TCH crying home to mama! That means better, smoother looking images. HI-RES 32-bit, 3D gaming up to 2048×1536 means that when ‘intense applications’ leaves his house, THE 9500 SLAPS THAT PIG DOWN, SAYS “GIMME MY MONEY BI-A-TCH!”<\/p>\n

BITCH’N Visual Effects
\nSMARTSHADER 2.0 provides FREAK\u2019N AWESOME lighting effects. The 9500 PRO supports DirectX\u00ae 9.0 and OpenGL\u00ae ATI’s CHARISMA ENGINE II fronts ‘Transformation and Lighting’ (T&L) at 62.5 million triangles per second. “62.5M per second?”YOU BET YO’ ASS 62.5M PER SECOND! PIXEL TAPESTRY II, 3D rendering engine, powers an AWESOME 2.4 gigatexels\/second for fill ratesat 32-bit HI-RES.<\/p>\n

Ever have TWO MONITORS at one time?
\nThrow in DVD support and you have yourself a threesome…<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/cite>
\nHeaving orbs? < sigh ><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

VisionTek sure uses some wacky terms to describe their video cards. Check this out… With 8 pipelines, pushing through 3 BILLION pixels per second, and 4 parallel GEO-Metry engines, processing 380 million [T&L] polygons per second, this card gives GRATUITOUS, adult entertainment. The 9800XT supports 128-bit, 64-bit and 32-bit floating-point color formats. HI-RES 32-bit, 3D\u2026<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[13,15,34],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6342","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-computers","category-found-things","category-moved-from-livejournal"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/nuxx.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6342","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/nuxx.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/nuxx.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nuxx.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nuxx.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6342"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/nuxx.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6342\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":15288,"href":"https:\/\/nuxx.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6342\/revisions\/15288"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/nuxx.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6342"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nuxx.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6342"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nuxx.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6342"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}